How are you? I am well, thank you for asking. Are you enjoying the summertime weather and general free-for-all that is the delicious foliage in these parts?
You know, I'm just going to jump right into it.
I have a problem, you see. I have this lovely bird feeder all stocked, and not a single one of you fine, feathered creatures seems willing to partake in the feast. At the moment, I was hoping to start out small, with thistle, trying to get some finch action up in here.
Mmmm, thistle.
I realize that thistle isn't a number-one choice for all little birdies, but it was a starting line. A jumping off point, you might say. And yet? Nothing. Absolutely no little finchy finches.
Perhaps you are all gorging yourselves with the fruit of the mulberry tree in Neighbor Bob's yard. Perhaps you have spotted Fluffy or Fluffy 2.0 and are wary. Rightfully so. That's very intuitive of you all, precious little birdies. Fluffy and any other roaming counterparts are not to be trusted. Hell, I don't even like crossing their well-worn paths.
But I hate to think that every single one of you is a coward. THAT'S RIGHT, I SAID IT. There is lovely thistle here and it needs to be eaten.
Regarding me, there is nothing to be afraid of. This is the view that you will have when dining here at my fine establishment:
Except that I won't be standing outside in a pink shirt taking pictures. Not right away, at least.
Because, and please understand this, I will be here! Inside the house! Away from you! In the house!
So here is what I am thinking. I propose that you internet-savvy little birdies spread the word that there is lovely, nutritious thistle available FREE FOR THE TAKING and that you are all welcome to bust on by. Anytime. And I promise to do my best at deflecting Fluffy, Fluffy 2.0, and any other shenanigan-makers in the general vicinity so that you may all dine in peace.
Love, Heather
P.S. Please tell the other birdies, your sparrow friends and cardinal-type friends that there will be other food available shortly.
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