Wednesday, March 31, 2010


I think that I am going to have to resuscitate the whole "posting every day" thing that I had going on in February. I have faltered this month, for no good reason, and even though I have a backlog of posts, I have yet to complete them. Well, they're finished, but not polished. And what kind of writer would I be if I did not polish my late-night, drunken, barely-conscious prose?

Until tomorrow, then.


Friday, March 19, 2010

Raisins. An Irrational Hatred.

You know when you’re really looking forward to something and then when it happens, you get all mad at yourself for psyching yourself up in the first place because it only served to let you down?

Yeah, that was my morning.

I got off the bus downtown and started my walk to campus. I beelined (however, not like the Beetard) to Biggby for a bagel. Not just any bagel, oh no. This is the best bagel to ever bagel. It is a – wait for it – cinnamon vanilla bagel. It’s pretty much awesomeness in circular form.

Alas, there was a new barista working. She not only had no idea who I was (the NERVE), she accidentally gave me the wrong fucking bagel.

So I got to work, took my time to painstakingly prepare my warm, toasted, lovely bagel with a little butter, and took my first bite. This first bite - an action that should have been accompanied by a chorus of angels – was a complete farce. A FARCE.

For you see, I had just bitten into a warm, gooey RAISIN.

Oh. OH, how I hate raisins in bagels. I think that they are just divine on their own, but not in bagels. NOT IN BAGELS.

I plucked out the shriveled parasitic fruit from the bagel and it wasn’t half bad. And I had white tea. The morning was not ruined.


Thursday, March 18, 2010

The Awesomeness of Threadless

Hey you guys!

Threadless tees are on sale today. Today only! Only $10 each!

You should get MANY. Click here to get some of the awesomeness!

I think that I will get some for my nieces. Like this one:

OH! Or this one:

I heart Threadless.

Saturday, March 13, 2010

Cookie Monster

Sometimes, you just need a cookie.

Luckily for me, there are more than enough places on campus to choose from, and it seemed like a good idea to try a chocolate chip-ish cookie at as many places as possible. You know, to find the best choice. It's a hard job, but someone had to do it, right?

Here are my latest trials, in alphabetical order:

Milk Chocolate Chunk
size: 4 ounces
price: (free for me - leftover from a luncheon)
grade: B

The chocolate is nice. The cookie is nicely sweet and there is a lovely hint of vanilla. The cookie itself is a little too crumbly, but all in all, it was good. Plus it was free, but I will not take that fact into consideration.

Insomnia Cookies (sold at Stucchi's)
Chocolate Chunk
size: 4 oz
price: $1.00
grade: A+

Served warm (as advertised!), these cookies are hard to beat. The edge is crispy and the middle is soft and gooey. The chocolate chunks are huge. They look and taste like homemade cookies from grandma's house. Fantastic. Lastly, you can order them online and have them DELIVERED. That's awesome.

Jimmy John's
Chocolate Chip
size: 4 ounces
price: $1.09, but don't waste your money
grade: D

Ugh. These taste like mass-produced cookies on their way to 7-11. They're not very soft, and often taste a little stale. There's a good amount of chocolate in each one, but otherwise stay away.

Chocolate Chunk
size: 4 ounces
price: I don't remember...
grade: B

I think that these cookies are just fine. The amount of chocolate is nice, but a bit too overwhelming for me. They're also a little too crisp for my liking.

Oatmeal Chocolate Chip
size: 4 ounces
price: $1.09
grade: A

Potbelly has great cookies, and this oatmeal fusion cookie was one of my favorites. I've never been an oatmeal cookie kind of person, except for the no-bake cookies I remember making at Girl Scout camp. But these cookies are awesome. Baked fresh daily, they are always soft and chewy. The chocolate chips are well dispersed. Best of all, they're not overly sweet.

Rocky Mountain Chocolate Factory
Chocolate Chip
size: 4 ounces, maybe a little more
price: $2.54
grade: B+

It didn't hurt that this cookie was fresh out of the oven - she placed the cookie in my hand with the spatula. It melted in my mouth. The dough was just cooked, which was satisfying. It reminded me of how I tend to eat cookie dough from the bowl instead of dropping it onto cookie sheets. It was the most expensive though, and that hurt its score.

The verdict? The Insomnia cookie was AMAZING. Go get one! Or twelve!

Friday, March 12, 2010

So, The Oscars

For the first time since 1943, there were ten best picture nominees for the 82nd Academy Awards.

And I haven't seen a single one.

This is a little embarrassing for me - I usually try to see as many of the nominees as possible. I've seen some great movies this past year, but apparently I was not all that discriminating.

The only movies I saw that had nominations in any of the categories were:

Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince (Cinematography)
Julie & Julia (Best Actress, Meryl Streep)
Sherlock Holmes (Art Direction, Music)
The Young Victoria (Art Direction, Costume Design)

And I only saw three of them in theaters. All were fantastic movies in many ways, and I think that the acting in The Young Victoria was overlooked. Sherlock Holmes was entertaining and fun, and the script was wonderful. And though I haven't seen The Blind Side, was Sandra really good enough to beat Meryl's amazing Julia Child?

I've heard lots and lots of things about Avatar, both good and bad, and I really have no desire to see it. I'm sure that I will eventually, but amazing special effects aren't really enough to get me into the theater when I've learned more than enough about the boring it's-been-done-so-many-times-before storyline. The Hurt Locker was greatly rewarded, but it looks so heavy.

I don't know. Just another reason I love my Netflix, I suppose.

Thursday, March 11, 2010

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

The Pope Must Be Very Comfortable

BF: "Right now, you have a pillow collection to rival that of the Vatican."
Me: "What?"
BF: "Have you ever been to the Vatican, honey?"
Me: "Nope."
BF: "There are over two hundred pillows per person at the Vatican."

Monday, March 08, 2010

It's in MY WAY

Much of the snow has melted here, so maybe this is superfluous bitching, but who the hell leaves a sweet ass Schwinn on a bus stop for over six months?

It has been in my goddamned way on the bus stop for months. I just want someone to claim it. Maybe take it out for a spin. You know, get it the fuck off of the bus stop.

If not, what is the statute of limitations on abandoned bicycles? Because that is a sweet ass Schwinn and I would gladly take it off someone's hands if s/he would come and unlock it.

Also, there's no such thing as superfluous bitching. If there is, then my life clearly has no meaning.

Sunday, March 07, 2010

Little Glass Birds

Growing up, I was lucky to have the love and support of all four of my grandparents. They were all happy and healthy and were amazing role models in their own ways. Coming of age during the Great Depression, they took those experiences with them into the future, and their lives were decidedly marked by their childhoods. I believe that my parents, and now my brother and I, are the people we are because of the actions and sacrifices of these amazing people.

I have many, many stories about my grandparents, but this particular one is about my mom's mother. We called her Mimi. My eldest cousin, Holley, started calling her that. I don't know how it came about - perhaps it was because she couldn't say "Grandma" - but my grandma was, and will forever be, Mimi.

Mimi loved birds. She loved watching them outside on her bird feeders, and she collected tiny little bird figurines. Some were ceramic, some glass. She displayed them on a cubbied display shelf in the kitchen. I used to stand on a kitchen chair for what seemed like hours and examine all of the little collectibles and figurines within. I remember their beauty and delicacy. I never touched anything for fear that I would break one.

When I was still young, Mimi was having horrible headaches. During her eventual brain surgery, she suffered an aneurysm. This triggered a stroke which left her paralyzed on her left side. She didn't retain much of her memory and she couldn't walk. She recovered amazingly well over the years, but I never really got to know my Mimi as I wanted to. I knew her when I was a little girl, never as a teenager. Never as an adult.

I know that she knew who we were, though. Even when she was calling my mom "Gertrude" or some other random name that would enter her mind, I really believe that she knew what was going on.

And her little birds remained in their places in the kitchen.

She passed away in 2000, and my papa eventually removed them from their kitchen cubbies. I'm sure that it was just too difficult for him to be reminded of her like that. These tiny figurines - little more than decoration to the unknowing eye - were cleared away. My papa replaced the cubbies with models of antique car, his favorite collectibles.

One day, I asked him for a few of the birds, and he gladly and lovingly handed them over. Now they sit on my windowsill, catching the morning light and reminding me of my Mimi. My papa gives me a little glass bird for Christmas every year now, and I display them all together on the windowsill.

Every time I look at my little glass birds, I think of my Mimi and my Papa. And every time, I remember how lucky I am.

Friday, March 05, 2010

Happy Birthday K-10!

You are thirty today!
(No, really - she is.)
(I know, I don't believe it, either.)

You do things like go to random museums with me,
even when you might think they are totally lame.

You are the awesome.

I hope you have the happiest of happy birthdays!

Thursday, March 04, 2010

What Have I Gotten Myself Into?

After seeing The Dark Knight:

BF: "Would you still be with me if I started painting my face like the Joker?"
Me: "Sure. If you were still you."
BF: " What if I started acting like him, but was totally nice and sweet to you?"
Me: "Well maybe. There would have to be exceptions, though."
BF: "No exceptions."
Me: "Well, as long as I didn't have to hear about what you're doing."
BF: "You don't understand. I would NEED the newspapers."
Me: "Well that's true."
BF: "NOW, we're getting somewhere..."

Wednesday, March 03, 2010


My friend Laurel got a Roku. What's a Roku? It's AWESOME, that's what it is. It's awesome and I WANT ONE.

It allows you to watch Netflix movies immediately, on your tv, while you sit on your ass, on the comfy couch, with the smell of microwave popcorn wafting in from the kitchen. There's no waiting for a new disc to arrive in the mail. I love Netflix, but that's where it always seems to bite me in the ass.

You see, my boyfriend Mike will think of a movie that he wants. to. see. NOW., but by the time it arrives at my house (several days), he's not only not in the mood to watch it, he's pretty much forgotten about wanting to see it in the first place.

The Roku would be IDEAL for us. It would make Mike happy, and it would keep me from watching hours and hours of ESPN.

Of course, it could also backfire. The movies that were both too horrible to see in the theater AND too horrible to get on Netflix? They could easily be at the forefront of the Roku watching. I mean, we make really bad decisions with movies sometimes (see here. And here. And oh my Lord, here).

Perhaps I need to rethink this.

Tuesday, March 02, 2010

I'm About Done With the Majesty of Winter

It's really been snowing here. It's pretty much par for the course for Michigan in February-March, but still. It snowed every day last week, and on a few of those days, Mother Nature pelted us with ice-pellet snowflakes, leaving faces red and raw. It was delightful.

Snow just keeps accumulating. Again, it's quite lovely, but it's to the point where it's getting monotonous and irritating.

It's spring break here on campus (ironic, no?), so while those of us left toiling are glad for the deserted streets and buildings, the snow and ice isn't getting cleared as quickly as it should. Makes for some slippery commutes across campus, that's for sure. Though I'd take slipping and falling on my ass in front of no one than having it happen in front of a bunch of cocky undergrads.

To brighten my mood, I wear a different scarf each day. These are my last four choices. I have many, many more. It's a sickness, really.

My landlord, in North Carolina for the winter, pays my neighbor to clear my sidewalk. What she didn't ask him to do is clear around my car so that I don't have to be shin deep in snow every time I need to drive. But he does. He's such a nice guy.

He doesn't clear the snow off of my sweet baby Focus, however. I do that. Gladly.

All in all, I love winter. After DC's "normal" winters (I'm not counting this year, obviously), which consisted of a few inches total and maybe a bout of freezing rain, I feel lucky to now be able to experience the beauty of winter.

But I'm about done with the experiencing. Bring on spring!

Monday, March 01, 2010

Polar Opposites

This morning, I had two songs stuck in my head. I alternated between them both, and even with the iPod on random and the volume high enough to block out the sounds of the bus, I was at a loss.

The songs? Blame Canada from South Park: Bigger Longer & Uncut and Poor Unfortunate Souls from The Little Mermaid. That makes sense, right?

In case you were wondering, no, I cannot explain it. But how awesome is Ursula, anyway? (Answer: Very awesome.)

To make things worse, let me tell you about the two movies I watched last night. One is a movie Mike has been trying to get me to watch for months, the other is an absolute triumph in modern movie-making with amazing acting and an even better storyline. See if you can guess which is which:

Boondock Saints and Princess Diaries 2: Royal Engagement.

So there's that.