Saturday, December 19, 2009

I Hated Her So... Much...

I have to admit, I think that I am pretty hot shit when it comes to knowing about upcoming films and whatnot, so I am completely embarrassed to report that this one completely slipped me by.

Gore Verbinski, director of the Pirates of the Carribbean franchise (the first was fun and entertaining, the second suh-HUCKED and I explained why in my review, and I certainly didn't feel like wasting my time on the third. I've since heard that this was a good decision).

I mean, I'm sure that he's a fine director, but... but...

It's been announced that he's on board to direct a remake of Clue.

I will let that one sit and marinate for a while.

CLUE. With an absolutely brilliant cast, a hilarious script, and a huge cult following, it is to be remade into a " thriller and transmedia event that uses deductive reasoning as its storytelling engine."


You know, I was pissed off about the Charade remake, annoyed with the idea of a Neverending Story remake, and pissed off again about the remake of The Women (have you seen the original? It's FANTASTIC).

But now? The flames... flames on the side of my face... I am MAD. From other articles I've read about this travesty, it sounds like they're taking the whodunit idea from the original movie (and board game, I suppose), and pretty much leaving everything else in the plot. It probably won't be a comedy.

So WHY use the original title?

If that's not the case, then Verbinski has many issues to realize including, how is a singing telegram girl going to show up at locales all over the world to sing and tap dance? This is just one problem. And as there is no way possible to replace the brilliant Madeline Kahn, I suggest that they cut the role of Mrs. White altogether. It's the only thing that makes sense.



Em said...


JLR said...

Dude. I KNOW. I could have sworn that I'd blogged about this back in February, but apparently not. I've been crossing my fingers that nothing would come of it. And no one thinks this is a good idea, but of course that doesn't stop Hollywood.

A little part of me dies every time I think about it.

lem said...

Why do they need to mess with great movies by remaking them? The remakes are never as good! I'm trying really hard right now to think of a remake that I thought was as good as or better than the original...

Heather said...

Em - YES.

JLR - I really, really, REALLY hope that it gets shelved.

lem - I don't know. I think that the remake of The Parent Trap was pretty awesome, and maybe slightly better than the original, but only because it was easier to relate to with more current ideas and themes. Otherwise, the original blows Lohan out of the water.