Question: Am I An Idiot?

In case you were wondering, the answer is "yes."

Yes, I am an idiot, and yes, it is possible to cut yourself with a plastic knife while coring an apple.

The hand of a moron.

I assembled a healthy breakfast this morning: one slice of leftover cheese pizza, an apple with peanut butter, and water. And the mocha from Biggby that I grabbed this morning because it was my free drink!

But you see, because of my extensive dental and orthodental (I just made that up!) work, I have to slice my apples and cut my corn off of the cob (I'm like an eight year old!), just to make sure I don't fuck up my teeth even more than they already are. So that's what I was planning to do with my breakfast apple. Plus, it makes it easier to dip in peanut butter.

My plans were thwarted, however, because for some reason, there were no actual sharp knives in the kitchen at work. So again, as any intelligent, twenty-nine year old woman would do, I grabbed a plastic knife.

The rest is history. But really, coupled with the underwear-taping of a few days ago, I do wonder how I manage to get through most days unscathed. Perhaps my idiocy and ingenuity find some sort of balance.