Wednesday, September 01, 2010

A Little Help Here

Oh my GOD, I think that I am going to go insane.

Microsoft Office Suite. Hello. I know that you think that you are quite slick by "helpfully" including formatting shortcuts, but guess what? YOU CANNOT READ MY MIND. No, you cannot! So stop "anticipating" what you think that I want, because even I don't know what I want 93% of the time. QUIT IT.

I use excel for the very, very basic reason for which it was envisioned. I create mailing lists. But OH MY GOD, somebody explain to me why excel hates me so much? (Maybe it's because I think that all excel can do is make mailing lists?)

When I enter an email address, I'm usually not finished with the document, and I have more information to enter like a helper monkey. So I move to another cell. I accomplish this by clicking something else or hitting the return or tab key. Immediately, the fucking email address changes to a different, ugly, stupid font, turns blue, and becomes a fucking hyperlink. HOW DO I MAKE THIS STOP??!?!?

I swear to GOD, if I had money, I would send it to anyone who would tell me how to make this stop. But since I do not have money of any kind, I will send you a thank you card. I WILL.


jal said...

I too despise this part of autocorrect

go to Tools -> AutoCorrect options...

tab to AutoFormat As You Type

uncheck Internet and network paths with hyperlinks.

lem said...

You seem to have monkeys on the brain.

Heather said...

josh - YOU ARE TEH AWESOME. Thank you!

lem - I know. I think that it's because I had just looked at Shane's gchat icon, the helper monkey on The Simpsons, and all I could think about was how much I really wanted to see that episode. HELP... MOJO...

Heather said...

josh - SON OF A BITCH. I have Office 2007 and these rules DO NOT APPLY. HELP.