The Ghetto Factor: Union Station vs. Ballston Mall

So if the Ballston Mall is the original ghetto mall, what is Union Station?

If it was just a mall, then Union Station would win the ghetto title hands down. The damn kids are so GD obnoxious, and they seem to be everywhere ("I have no respect for people with no shopping agenda.") And the multitudes of tourists aren't much better. That was one good thing about the Ballston Mall - no self-respecting tourist would ever set foot there, that's for sure. (Pentagon City? Well, that's another story altogether). But Union Station is not just a mall - it's a freakin' train station and apparently the most-visited landmark in Washington, D.C. It has pretty architecture and high ceilings and people coming and going. It's fun and exciting.

Union Station has stores from which self-respecting people would actually buy things like Express, The Body Shop, and Ann Taylor. Ballston Mall has several sports stores and a Wet Seal - the trashiest of trashy teen stores. They both have a Victoria's Secret, because let's be honest, every woman needs $62 bras with sequins and fringe.

They both have a movie theater, but I think that Ballston wins the ghetto prize for this one because of the constant stream of teenagers running from one theater to the next. I love how they think they invented the whole "sneaking out of one movie to see another movie."

Restaurants - now here's a tricky one. Union Station has a better food court and interesting eateries, but is constantly flooded with tourists. Ballston lacks the obnoxious tourists, and has the fabulous Bailey's Pub and Grill, home of the Black Forest sandwich. Union Station also has an Auntie Anne's Pretzels (yum) and a Ben & Jerry's. Ballston has that awesome cookie place. I don't know, I think this one is pretty much tied. There are more options at Union Station, however...

At Ballston, a woman is stared down by members of category B and the comments she hears are disgusting and inappropriate - that is, if they are even in English. At Union Station, out-of-state teenagers hit on you and follow you around, and Awesome Roommate is asked if she "dates outside her race."

I have yet to see mall walkers at Union Station. The walkers at Ballston have matching red sweatshirts.

Ghetto verdict: Ballston wins.