I remember getting a "You Go Girl" type forward during my freshman year of college. You know what I'm talking about - forwards (along with email in general) were new and fun and you had yet to see the same ones over and over again and you'd actually send along the chain letters just because they warned that you'd fail your next midterm if you didn't?
Right. So this forward had a ton of "cute" quips about women. Most were lame. The one I always kept with me, however, never fails to make me laugh. It read something like this:
"Skinny women piss me off. They say things like, 'You know, sometimes I forget to eat.' Forget to eat? Now, I've forgotten my pin number, left clothes in the dryer for days, and even left the kids too long at daycare. But I've never forgotten to eat! You have to be a special kind of stupid to forget to eat."
Special kind of stupid - I love that phrase.
The thing is, I am that especially stupid skinny woman. I forget to eat lunch all of the time. Take today, for example. For once, I had a pile of things to do. I was breezing through each task -- entering new data, filing letters of recommendation, creating folders for new applicants. All of a sudden, it's 4. In the afternoon. What the hell? I guess it's nice to get to leave early because in your stupidity you forgot to eat lunch, but still...
I'm going to blame most of today's meal-skipping on this sweet cold I picked up the other day. Probably on the metro-germ factory. Everyone in the DC metro area is sick and phlegmy. I went to the Chinatown CVS this morning before work (I can't believe it's open 24 hours. How does it not get robbed every night?), and the cold/allergy section had been ambushed. It was like picking through the bins on the last day of Victoria's Secret's semi-annual sale-a-thon -- you have your eyes peeled, desperately trying to locate the matching bra and thong set, but rarely do you find both in your size. The moral of this story? Go early.
Anyway, I managed to find a dual pack Tylenol Cold - daytime and nighttime. Fantastic! Popped the non-drowsy ones at work, but never managed to gain an appetite. Ah well. I'm hungry now - time for lunch!
4 comments:
not gonna lie.... I WISH I would forget to eat.
Want my germs? You won't even think about eating with this cold/flu fabulousness!
I almost felt sick yesterday... alas, no such luck.
I always remember to eat... even when I'm not hungry! Unfortunately, I "forget" to go to the gym.
Anyways, here's some semi-relevant bottlecap wisdom for you, "Optimism can sometimes make you look stupid, but cynicism always makes you look cynical." If I had the bottlecap with me, I'd tell you who said it.
Thanks, Gabe. You're right, though. I'd rather look stupid than cynical. Let me tip my half-full glass to you! :)
Post a Comment