Dear Credit Card Companies,When I receive mail like this, "Please Do Not Discard" means "Immediately Shred Into Tiny Pieces." Seriously, do you think that this is going to get me to open the envelope, much less apply for your plastic snare?
Now, if it read, "Pictures of Puppies Inside!" or "Open for Free Coupon For Willy Wonka Candy - Especially Bottlecaps," I would be much more likely to tear it open - I love Bottlecaps.
And what's with the polite, "Please?" You could be all, "Open Now or We'll Chase You Down With a Pitchfork. AHHHHHHH!!!!"
Work on that.
Love, Heather
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