Misuse of the Mails

With the exception of the AARP membership that I got when I was seventeen, this is possibly the weirdest thing that I have ever received in the mail:

I don't know why.

'MURICA!

Happy Independence Day, America! Today, I am thankful for my freedom and to the people who have died to make it so.

So here's a sweet picture I took back in 2005 when I lived in a neat place:

Pretty!

Being 24 years old and sitting on the National Mall to watch light balls explode over monuments? SUPER COOL. 

Being 33 and watching light balls explode over a golf course? SUPER BORING.

Also, Mike bought some cases of 'MURICA water:

Now THAT'S how you celebrate freedom.

Oh Sweet God!

I was working at the Medical School these past few months, and there are ALL SORTS of things that I encountered on a daily basis that defy explanation.

Trust me.

But here's a fun example: This is a photograph that hangs in the Dean's office space, and I am just assuming that it's a class of future doctors, NOT a class of future psychopaths. But every time that I walk by, I almost want to duck out of the way because it is fucking CREEPY.

Not so bad, right? Well...

OMG.

Clearly he is trying to STEAL MY SOUL.

Oh, HAI.

I have been BUSY. With THINGS. Important THINGS.

...

Not really. I'm just lazy.

Anyway, I'm not making excuses for LIVING my LIFE - I just thought that I'd let you know that I am, indeed, still alive. And chock full of stories!

Like yesterday, I saw books on the side of the road. They were spine down, pages fluttering in the wind, and I was both incredibly sad and seething with anger. THOSE POOR BOOKS. What kind of monster did this to you?

I mean, I was more upset about dead books on the side of the road than I usually am about dead deer and groundhogs and squirrels. Which says something about me? I don't know.

Anyway, it's SUMMER and it's AWESOME and life is GOOD. And I'm going to be better about this here blog thing.